I could care less about politics and had never exercised my right to vote. I never felt like my opinion mattered, things would just roll on as they always had. I watched my country fall apart under the leadership of a clueless man which only seemed to strengthen my belief because really, if my (our) opinion did matter would he have ever made it into a 2nd term? It all just seemed so... pointless.
And then the tide changed directions suddenly and out of nowhere. A black man and a woman were battling it out for the Democratic nomination for President. This is getting interesting, I thought to myself. I began to watch, I began to learn, I began to become... invested. Jon Stewart and Bill Maher were now heading two of my newest TV show favorites (sure, they aren't on MSNBC but baby steps for me, please.) I found myself in the middle of discussions I never thought I'd have, debating issues and policies. And then, to my surprise, it became even bigger than it already was.
Obama won the Democratic nomination and he was pitted against McCain, who I will say is a very honorable man, but who made a ridiculous choice for his running mate. Immediately, I was scared. It was so obvious to me that having someone like Palin so close to the most powerful seat in the nation was ludicrous, but I wondered, was America ready to overlook the lines of race and elect a black President even if they knew how terrible a President she would be should anything happen to McCain? I'm a 3rd generation American of Puerto Rican decent (which is actually a part of America anyway, but we won't get into that right now) and even I have experienced my share of racism. I was nowhere near convinced that the people of my country could overpower this.
It came down to the last weeks before election day where I bit my nails continuously as I monitored various polls. Democrats were sure of a victory, but I felt caution - 90% of anything I've ever wanted, I didn't get because (I feared) I wanted it too badly. Just wait until the eve of November 4th you guys, just wait and then celebrate! And then November 4th came.
I live in New York, so yeah, in essence my vote didn't "matter" because Obama was going to win NY regardless of how I voted. But it DID matter. It mattered because I was a part of an incredible wave of participation this country has never seen before. It mattered because I felt my heart beating through my chest as I entered the polling area. It mattered because it was about time I learned how to work a poll booth (and let me tell you, all those little levers are confusing. I pulled a monitor aside and asked her, "Can you please just show me how to vote for Obama?" With a smile, she obliged.) It mattered because if he won I could say I was a part of it. It mattered because...because it just DOES.
As I worked around my house, busying myself with anything that had nothing to do with watching election specials on TV, I started to lose control. I switched on the tube. Obama was leading but there was a gap of less than 75. I kept it together, we still hadn't won YET. I spoke to my friend Jerry on the phone, "I'll believe it when I see it" he said. I was with him 100%.
And then we saw it.
The West coast polls closed and Obama soared well past 270. I shouted incoherent noises and told Jerry I had to call him back. And when we hung up, and I sat down on my couch, I put my head in my hands and cried.
This wasn't just a battle to get a man into the White House. This had been a battle to show each and every one of us that change IS happening. Change in our ability to ignore race and respect capability and human quality. Change in the way my generation rocked the SHIT out of this vote (pardon my French, I needed it for the emphasis.) Change in the way we view opportunity. Change in the way we feel our voices are heard. Change. Change....Change.
For the first time in my life, I care about this country. I care what happens. I care to participate....
I leave you with this quote, I'm not sure who said it, but I feel it says it all...
“Rosa sat, so Martin could walk. Martin walked, so Obama could run. Obama is running, so our children can fly.”
and so now, we can say they can...
3 comments:
Inspiring stuff. Hopefuly Mccain can mourn his loss in one of his 8 houses. And I am counting the days until we see, "The Sarah Palin Show!" With her first guest: John Mccain! And musical guest Daddy Yankee!
Dude, I want to do "The Sarah Palin Show"!
I echo your sentiments wholeheartedly and have also been on the verge of tears ever since. I don't care what some people say, but I've never been prouder of my country. Yes we DID.
The right to vote is powerful. And I feel fortunate that I, as American, have the opportunity to speak my mind. Our vote was heard loud and clear. Surely, I admire McCain and agree with you that he IS an honorable man and I didn't doubt his ability to serve as president but Obama represents change on many levels and to vote for him was to allow myself to step outside the box and give change a chance. And I believe that yes we can make change happen. Maybe not today, or tomorrow but in time, it'll happen. Lauren, thanks for sharing such deep thoughts.
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