A Nightmare on My Street

First off, let me start by saying this post is not about some neighborhood meltdown. No one was robbed or battered during the writing of this blog. What is it about then? A childhood fear realized in its entirety.

When I was almost four years old I was consumed by many things; Rainbow Brite, My Little Pony and chasing cute boys. (It started early, what can I say?) During one particular chase I ended up in a dark room with the only light shining from a TV in a far corner. A VHS player cranked nosily and a movie crept across the screen. I was mesmerized. By the boy I was chasing of course! But later, I was also intrigued by the screen. Something was happening. Something bad, and I couldn't turn away. A man in a red and black stripped sweater, face leaky and holed, brown Fedora draped on his skull, was creeping across the tube and he was scary. Super scary. Like scary in a way that one little 4 year old could never forget. He was Freddy Kruger. And because of him, I wouldn't sleep for the next seven years.

From the moment I saw "A Nightmare on Elm Street" I lost my sense of cool. Everything scared the crap out of me, even my Carebear if you threw a trashy Fedora on it. At first I couldn't sleep alone at all. When dawn would arrive you'd find me in one of two places: my mother's bed or her floor (if I was kicked out of said bed.) As I grew, the fear subsided, but only by spoonfuls. I had to sleep with the TV on. Then with a night light. And, on the eve of my start to the seventh grade, I gave it my best shot and went to sleep with a hope that nothing would go bump in the night, or claw me to death from under my bed (lovely.) I made it through that night (and all the others that followed.) Until tonight. Tonight I came face to face with my fear.

I was to attend the Fearnet screening of "Fear Clinic" starring none other than Robert Englund. I had to say his name 30 times before finally realizing it wasn't actually Freddy. I floated around the party, Chardonnay in my well-past-four-year-old hand, and while looking at my Blackberry, nearly walked into the legend himself. Looking very distinguished in a grey jacket with the collar popped, Mr. Kruger didn't look so menacing. He almost looked cool. He's just a man. He's just an actor. Nine years of insomnia for what?

I crept up to him. "Excuse me, Mister Englund?"
He turned to me with a smile.
"Because of you, I lost nine years of sleep."
He smiled at me, put an arm on my shoulder and said, "Sweetheart, it's a dirty job, but someone has to do it."
Then he posed for this picture...





...and suddenly...
I'm scared ALL over again.

=o)

Electric Empire Bridge

Subject: NY

Soundtrack: Jay-Z "Empire State of Mind" and Eddy Grant "Electric Avenue"

I have a friend named Molly. She's a lot of what I am and pieces of what I want to be. When choosing a place for my bday dinner she ventures outside the city (I usually stay w/in 3 avenues of my job. Lame.). "Let's go to Dumbo (Brooklyn.)" So we end up at The Water Street Restaurant. It's the kind of places that screams "You're by the water!" the moment you enter. And that's incredibly cool.

There are mouth watering burgers and a wine selection good enough to make you lick your lips twice. Many things to talk about but we are more like vacationers in a foreign city remembering the woes of our home land. This is awesome.

Tummies full and several brain cells depleted, we are done. "Let's check out the hood," says Molly. I easily oblige. I trust this girl will find fun in anything she adds to her to-do list. We head towards Brooklyn Heights.

Up a hill and over a cobble stoned street, she stops, mouth agape. "What's wrong?" She turns to me and asks, "Can we walk the Brooklyn Bridge?" And it is then I remember I never have. I nod with childish excitement and with a skip we scratch a check onto our bucket list.

It's foggy out. Several buildings disappear into the white-grey thickness above. Captivating is not strong enough a word. Each piece of wood upon which we step reverberates 100 years of existence. I want to laugh. Just because. (What the hell was in that wine?)

We're giddy. It's ridiculous. But we pass a celebrity with a smile on her face and think, she gets it too.

New York City is called a lot of things. I think of only the positive as I gaze from halfway across the East River. I can never leave this place.

An Ipod speaker blares "I want to walk down to Electric Avenue." It's Molly. Now we're boogieing over the last few steps into Manhattan. We're laughing. It's fun.

Simply, because it's New York.

Are you a Work Jerk?

Five steps to becoming the ultimate Work Jerk:

1) Learn who they are (by watching a fabulous trailer):




2) Meet them individually and learn what makes them who they are (by clicking the banner below and being redirected to their video interviews.)



3) Check out their website and get your Work Jerk knowledge on (by going to http://www.theworkjerks.com/)

4) Join the rest of the internet world by tuning in on October 7th @ 10amEST to check out the first episode of The Work Jerks! (by clicking on this banner)



5) Be greatful that you had an amazing, extremely funny and very non-jerk cast and crew to work with in making this all come together :)

The Work Jerks is a 7 episode comedy webseries, executive produced by moi, written and directed by Jaime Fernandez, a product of Side Job Productions, LLC. Many thanks to all those involved. It was so much fun to produce. Let's keep our fingers crossed for a season two :)

Me, Prankster? Never! Well, maybe :)

Firstly, I realize it's been way too long since I last blogged and I'm aware that I need to step up the blog game just a bit.

Secondly, I learned a valuable lesson a couple of weeks ago: the best path to honesty is a prank.

There's this part of me that often wonders what my life would be like if I chopped half my hair off. Would every day be sunny? Would people treat me different? Would I develop special powers? (Unless extending your life span due to less time spent under a hair blower is considered magic, I think the latter is highly unlikely... BOO!)

A few weekends ago, while blowing out my heavily layered hair, I pulled the bottom layer into a pony tail and let the top layer dangle just above my chin. When I walked by a mirror I did a double take. With my hair straightened and pulled back in this particular way it totally looked like I had a bob. Interesting! I thought first. Then the devilish laugh started to bubble in my stomach and soon escaped my mouth. I quickly grabbed my camera phone, took a self portrait and sent it to several friends. This was the photo:

The replies? The three girlfriends I sent it to all loved it. They were in shock but loved it as most girls would because it's ....girly. The guys though? Ha! Their replies were "WTF?" "No you didn't!" And the best response? Jaime's: "You cut your hair?" which was then followed by "It's mad short." He's defies all that is obvious time and time again, amazes me. I think he may have passed out at some point in time because there was a delay between texts.

It wasn't until I sent out this photo later on in the day that everyone realized they had been totally fooled.

(Yes.. I took it in the bathroom of a wedding hall.) I could sense a sigh of text relief from several of those that had been pranked; Jaime, the happiest of all.

So what did I learn from this prank? There is something about hair, especially when it comes to women and how they wear theirs that completely transforms how they are perceived. There are some faces that can work with short hair and transform a woman into a sex kitten i.e. Victoria Beckham. Then their are the faces, like mine, that work with short hair in a way that makes us look cute and older. Personally, I can't picture myself cutting my hair above my shoulders until I have a small child to run after and having long hair is just a hassle. Until then, I'll stick with below the shoulder locks... And I'm guessing that pleases at least one person :-)

Citifield vs. Yankee Stadium- An Non-biased POV

Before I begin my review, let me dazzle you with a bit of back story in regards to my upbringing with the Yankees and the Mets...

Back in 1982, this picture was taken:

Yeah, that’s me, a little short of being one year old, and yes, those are Yankee colors I’m wearing. Why? Well, clearly, my parents were fans and so, by no choice of my own, I was branded. Good or bad? Well, let’s continue…

When I was still very young and under the care of two working parents, I was raised by my loving aunt with whom I spent countless hours…watching Mets games. I’m old enough to remember watching the last World Series won by the Mets (1986), while secretly wearing a Mets t-shirt (“Don’t tell your dad!” my aunt said, bribing me with chocolate chip cookies.)

Then came high school, during which the Yankees won two World Series, and the winning game of one series actually fell on my birthday. How could I resist cheering them on after that?

And now? Let’s say I’ve been influenced enough to simply enjoy watching both teams. With my history, you can see I’m hardly biased by either team. That being said, the following review comes from someone who wanted to check out these hugely expensive architectural structures and report back on her experience. So let’s start with the place where my journey began…Citifield.

April 25, 2009 – The Mets were playing the Nationals, it was a glorious 80 something degrees and I was visiting Citifield for the first time with friends who hadn’t yet seen it either, and who happened to just be die-hard Mets fans. First, let me show you their overall opinion:

Checking Out Mets Citifield
Uploaded by LaydeeRiv - More professional, college and classic sports videos.

As for me? I had no “he’s not really a Met” beef with the Jackie Robinson rotunda. I thought it was a beautiful way to capture the immediate attention of those visiting the field. It had a wonderful nostalgic element from the murals down to the choice of brick. Even the placement of the escalators was artistic. From that point on, the other places we ventured through continued to capture my interest. There’s nothing more alarming than prices of souvenirs at the various shops throughout the stadium, but at least they offered cool items like throwback jerseys and mixed color uniforms. The promenade was perfectly airy and the bridge leading from the promenade to the food court gave you both a spectacular view of the field, as well as the chop shops across the street from the stadium (who doesn’t like to be reminded of the surrounding neighborhood?) The food court itself was spacious, allowed for banter over beers and had one of the best burger joints ever: Shake Shack. Just the name makes me salivate. Too bad the line was ridiculously long, ending up eating Nathan’s hot dogs. Our seats were in the Pepsi porch section of the stadium. The upside: great view of the field (we paid $37/ticket), spacious and an open-air concession stand and standing tables right behind you in case you want to take a break from the game. Downside – if it’s raining, there’s nowhere to run for cover. Lucky for us it wasn’t raining and I came home with a tan and a smile.

May 6, 2009- I was asked to visit Yankee stadium with my friend and several of her friends, all avid Yankee fans. I quickly jumped at the chance for cheap tickets ($18 for a seat in the very top terrace and 11 rows back) after hearing the stadium seats are normally high in price. Upon exiting the 4 train we were immediately met by the pristine grey walls of the new stadium. I understand grey is a Yankee color but isn't there some way to brighten that up a little? Add some dark blue maybe? Other than the color, the structure itself is dynamic, like an alien world that landed smack in the middle of the Bronx. There will always be something majestic about it. Entering through the main gate, we walked directly into a large hallway that ran from left to right. Above us hung banners of the many Yankee legends, both former and current. The Yankee museum beckoned us, but I didn't get a chance to check it out. Just the fact that it exist within this fan space is a fantastic addition. We rode the (working) escalators to our level (this is a God send to Yankee fans who before had to deal w/endless ramps to find their destinations), passed the sealed off suite level and arrived at the promenade. Much like Citifield, the Yankee promenade is open air and allows for fans to stand and catch the game from different parts of the field. Each level houses several indoor bars/lounges as well. My only qualm is once inside you can only see the game on TV since they are situated opposite of the field. From where we sat the view of the field wasn’t bad at all, and I wasn’t overwhelmed by the feeling of being so high I might as well be in space. And, when the rain started to come down, I was overjoyed by the roof that loomed above us. Despite the loss the Yankees experienced that night, I still went home happy I’d been able to check out their new digs.

After visiting both stadiums, here’s what it came down to for me...Yankee stadium does better than Citifield at providing access to its culture and history for its die-hard fans. But, I am a die-hard for neither team. So while I enjoyed my time at both stadiums, it was really gauged by the experience and feel. Yankee stadium seems to be a place for revenue, high seat/food prices, an entire level dedicated to suites I’ll never be able to get into. Citifield felt like a hang out, a place you can go to see baseball, but also a place where you can walk around and chat over a (semi-reasonably priced) beer. It felt more like home. Which means more than likely, I’ll be visiting Citifield a few more times this season. But I still have love for you Yankees! And if one of you teams could just win the World Series this year, I'd really appreciate it ;)

Virtual Models and Such

This is what I do while Jaime watches the All-Star Slamdunk Contest... I make an online version of myself. Who knew this could actually be fun. Although I'm semi-creeped out by how much it looks like me. The body type/shape is EXACT!





Make yours at MVM.com


Ok, back to Valentine's Day fun :)

25 Things About Me

For those of you Facebookers, you've seen this note spreading like wild fire. For those of you who are not, there is a chain note of sorts going around that asks you to list 25 random things, goals or thoughts you have or are about yourself. I decided to do it and after the end found it to be somewhat enlightening. So, for those of you who haven't seen it, enjoy. I also encourage you to make the list for yourself, even if you're the only one that will ever read it...

1.I’m doing this because several of my friends who don’t know each other tagged me in theirs and now I feel obligated.
2.My middle name is Joy (but I’m probably the least chipper person you’ll meet.)
3.I don’t know where the last 6 years of my life went. I remember turning 21 and then POOF! Suddenly I’m 27.
4.I’m capable of a lot more than people want to admit or accept.
5.I’m determined to make the people in #4 WAKE UP and smell my coffee.
6.I remember when we did these “surveys” via email, when there were no social networks yet. I bet we were all more efficient at our jobs back then.
7.When I was 11 I wrote a short story that a professional writer mistook for something that might have been done by a college student.
8.As a child I believed my Sylvester the Cat doll would protect me from all evil.
9.I believe you cannot lose hope based on one person’s opinion. If I’ve learned anything being in this [entertainment] business it’s that for everyone one person who thinks they know what everyone else wants to read, watch and listen to, there are ten people that think they are wrong.
10.Chicken soup does soothe the soul. It’s making me feel warm and fuzzy right now.
11.Certain people you work with become family. How can they not when you spend more time with them than your actual family?
12.Sushi is incredibly overrated, but that’s my opinion. So, according to #9, I’m sure a bunch of people would disagree.
13.No matter how many friends I have, it’s always the same few that know everything that’s going on in my life.
14.(In honor of V-Day) Love is knowing that no matter how many lazy hours you spend with someone on a couch watching 30 Rock/Drake & Josh/random movies, it never feels old or boring.
15.The idea of having my own children one day completely overwhelms me and I don’t know when I’ll be confident to go through with it.
16.The jury is in (or so says Jonathan and I), having an awesome sense of humor is #1 in things that attract us to potential suitors.
17.I have somewhere between 10-15 unfinished manuscripts that have accumulated since I was a child.
18.It’s time to do something about # 17.
19.#18 was a way to add more to this list. Oh wait, so is #19. (Damn it I need 6 more!)
20.If I chose to go to Applebee’s, don’t give me the Weight Watchers menu. If I wanted to diet I wouldn’t be eating there. That’s like going to McDonald’s and ordering a salad.
21.I’m fully aware that I’m better looking when I’m tan.
22.I wonder when people will stop assuming that just because I’m Puerto Rican I probably grew up in the projects. (Um, no. I actually grew up in a house with a backyard and a pool. And I’m probably a lot smarter than you if you’re making that assumption.)
23.I may never understand my parents, but I’ll love them regardless and always.
24.I wish there were more ways to cook chicken.
25.If it weren’t for Jaime, I’m not sure I ever would have found and nurtured my creativity. I'm eternally grateful :)